Breaking Laws, Shipping Wine

"I love my fed-ex guy cause he's a drug dealer and he doesn't even know it...and he's always on time." -Mitch Hedberg

Of all of the things that are sent through the mail, it is hard to get a clear understanding of why I cannot get wine shipped to me legally in Massachusetts.  It seems like it could be an antiquated notion that is used to protect an outlet for underage drinking.  However, a UPS driver can check an ID as well as a bartender.  So what else could be the biggest threat of me ordering my wine online?  Unfortunately, the laws are put in place to protect the high prices of a three tier supply chain in the disguise of promoting local wineries.  Here are the basic facts:

-A winery cannot directly ship to Massachusetts if their production is over 30,000-gallons.  This is around 12,000 cases, eliminating most wineries.  Fortunately, this is above what any Massachusetts winery produces.  Unfortunately, there are very few inspiring wineries in the state.

-Furthermore, if any winery is represented in Massachusetts by a distributor within the last six months, they are not allowed to ship directly.  This leaves the distributor with almost complete price control because it isolates the consumer.

-FedEx and UPS have to acquire special licenses to carry alcohol and they do not pursue it.  Recent laws have been passed to turn the tides, but there still is no carrier that will accept this responsibility.

-Massachusetts has a limit of wine that can be bought by any particular individual.  The burden of keeping track of this is put on the winery.  Therefore, each winery has to track how much wine any person has bought from not only them, but any other winery.

It is in the interest of the industry to uphold these laws.  While as a consumer I am not looking to get wine from a winery direct, I am looking to get wine that I cannot find easily here or wine that is priced too high to justify it.  Therefore, if I followed the laws, I would have to pay Massachusetts prices or not have the wine at all.  Screw that.

I have built a collection of wine here in Massachusetts at prices that are well under, sometimes half of the price, as I find them locally.  I even have had the ability to buy wholesale and not paid prices that are as good as these web-based stores can offer.  And no, these are not sketchy, back-alley websites or second hand screwballs.  These are direct importers, industry professionals who have developed relationships with the wineries, and sellers who can work with serious volume and move product.  They are accessible, organized warehouses-turned-websites that set a high standard for service and value.  (I will mention here that wine.com does indeed ship within the state because they have local warehouses.  They also have Massachusetts prices.)

I will not name any of these websites; because although many thanks are due, my stories would offer more damage than it is worth.  I have purchased Italian collectibles at $60 less than they are put on the shelf for, and some '05 Bordeaux that is about $50 more on the wholesale book.  Sure, I am a ruthless bargain hunter, but my resistance has definitely been rewarding.  Even tack on shipping and the prices locally are still not reasonable.

Here are some experiences and tips that have allowed me to receive wine from out of state:

-My first online wine purchase got bounced back to the seller as soon as it his state lines.  I got in touch with the company and asked what happened.  He told me not to worry about it and that I would have my wine in two days.  Sure enough, two days later there was a package on my doorstep labeled "Fragile Artwork."

-Call the store you are looking to purchase from.  Often they have worked with customers in your state and will work with you to find a method to get the product to you.  Very often, their desire to take care of their customers will be motive enough for them to ship, one way or another.

-If you know somebody that works at or owns a restaurant, often they can receive wine easier because of their liquor license.  This seems to ease the burden on FedEx and UPS, although it is technically still wrapped in the same issues as delivering to a home.

-Have a relative that lives across state lines.

-Set up a shipping account with UPS or FedEx so that you are taking more of the legal burden than the store who is sending it.

These laws and the methods to circumvent them are an unfortunate arrangement.  Consider this: I have had a friend order three bottles of absinthe from Denmark and have UPS leave the package on their doorstep.  While lawmakers are spending our money fighting this battle and consumers are spending their money overpaying, little Johnny can hop on his computer and get international booze shipped without any questions.

It seems like the most rational thing to do would be refining the shipping and receiving policies so that alcohol is delivered in a safe manner and is taxed in a proper way.  This would be a big victory for the consumer, but it would be a big loss for the wholesalers.  The distribution companies have been protected for a long time and have been naming their own prices.  This has become transparent with our new era of instant information.  I think it is time to let me buy my wine.  Or move.